Your Front Row Seat to Your Life
What are you doing with your front row seat to your life? As I worked through some important family situations my coach said to me, “You have a front row seat to see what God is going to do.” That stopped me in my tracks and her words ring through my head every day. A situation I was trying to control suddenly became an opportunity to see what God has in store.
Seeking Connection or Control
A friend shared with me recently that in relationships we are always seeking either connection or control. We usually do this in subtle ways. Maybe we are people-pleasing in an effort to control how the other person sees us. Sometimes we ignore our own boundaries to control a perception of peace. It could be an outright act of control over our child’s behavior.
Our desire for control comes from our fear and lack of trust. We all do it. We all try to control situations and people so we feel safe. It’s biologically wired into us as a safety mechanism. Unfortunately, it often turns destructive in ways we may not even realize.
Instead of trying to connect with a teen, a mom seeks to control their behavior and ends up driving their teen further away. In an effort to keep a marriage together, one spouse might try to control the other’s spiritual life. A business owner who’s afraid of losing their company begins micro-managing their employees in hopes of avoiding ruin.
What burdens are you carrying?
What are you trying to control in your life? How heavy is that burden you’re carrying? You’re starting to feel the weight and pressure of it and it’s getting difficult to carry it around. You tell yourself that if you can just maintain control, everything will be okay.
Is there a situation that you feel powerless over? How is that impacting you right now? Is it showing up in your facial expressions, with a thin set smile that never quite reaches the eyes? Are you wringing your hands, trying to figure out how to fix the situation? Do you feel the tension in your shoulders that never seem to relax?
Take a front row seat to see what God will do
I want to make an invitation to you. Picture yourself in a theater. The play being performed is your own life. You get front row seats, but the only way to access your seat is to set down all of the things that you’re trying to control. You set those things down and settle in for the show. Suddenly, you’re able to see that in setting down your desire for control, everything is working out the way it’s meant to. You see your relationships blossom and thrive. There’s laughter around the dinner table and a new warmth in your home. Your friends seem more relaxed around you. People are asking you to mentor them because they see an easiness about you and they want it to. You see that your need for control was preventing you from having the life you want.
Is it Time for a 180?
My life has done a 180 since hiring my coach. In working with my coach I’m learning what I do and do not have control over. My relationships are thriving, my home is filled with laughter and my marriage is stronger than ever. I don’t have a perfect life, but it’s a healthier one.
It’s time to get curious. Examine your life and look for areas that you’ve been controlling. Take steps today to ease off that control and see what happens. If you need help laying down your need for control, then set up a consultation with me. I know what it’s like to try to control everything and I know what a relief it is to set that burden down.
I want to help you.
Don’t wait.
